Week 25

I almost didn’t post a blog this week. I was distracted and didn’t take my weekly trip out of town, so I didn’t think I had any engaging photos. I also didn’t think I had anything to say. Then the week progressed.

Against the odds

It seems like so much of my first chapter in France has been defined by achievements against the odds.

Last June, I excitedly posted that I had found the perfect apartment even though I had been told it was unlikely to happen before I arrived in France. Against the odds. The apartment was beautifully decorated and had everything I needed while I looked for something permanent. I expected to stay in it for at least a full year.

As I settled into my new life in Pézenas, I started to think about what I would want for the long term. Did I want to buy a house, get an unfurnished apartment, stay where I am? As much as I like this apartment, I found that it was missing a few things that are important to me. More than anything, I found myself missing outdoor space.

In Toronto, I used my condo balcony a lot. Each January, I would begin to map out the plants I would add in spring. As soon as it was warm enough, I would start to spend hours out there. All summer, I enjoyed my morning coffee on the balcony. I was back there after work, eating dinner and reading, and sometimes just sitting in the dark late into the evening. That small outdoor space brought me tremendous joy.

A few months ago, an apartment posted for rent in Pézenas caught my eye because of its magnificent stone balcony overlooking a courtyard. I should say caught my eye again because it was posted last year when I was planning my move to France. I inquired about it at that time but was told it had already been rented.

When I saw it on the market again, I initially dismissed the idea of applying for it because I didn’t feel ready to move. But, as time went on, I started to wrestle with that decision. I’ve been told by quite a few people that finding an apartment with outdoor space in Pézenas is rare., so why was I ignoring the opportunity?

I gave some thought to potential issues. Why is the current renter leaving? What if I have a difficult landlord (I’ve been blessed with a good one where I am now), what if there are problems with the plumbing or heating, what if the neighbours are noisy? I am prone to catastrophic thinking but these were also important considerations.

I finally came to the conclusion that I should at least apply for it. I assumed there would be competing applications, and I was right.

I viewed the apartment at the beginning of last week, loved it and immediately submitted my dossier. And then I waited. And waited. I’ve said before that I’m a ‘get things done’ kind of person. That also means I’m impatient. As the week went on, I learned that the owner was looking at two dossiers, mine and one other.

Then, on Wednesday of this week, I found out that my application had been successful! I’m moving into an apartment in the centre of Pézenas with a stunning balcony! Against the odds.

Landlord/tennant laws in France dictate that, with a furnished apartment, the renter needs to give one month’s notice. I’ve done that and will get the keys to the new place at the beginning of February. Paying for both apartments for one month seems worth it.

I’m excited! And I’m still processing – see below.

Here is a photo of my new apartment’s beautiful balcony.

Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose?

Now here’s the mental challenge that I struggled with this week – when is enough change, simply enough? After all, didn’t I just say that I needed to chill out? Am I cycling back into a loop of change like the kind I used to be caught in?

There was a period of time – over approximately 15 years – where I moved every two years and changed jobs more often than that. Partly it had to do with the way my brain works – I have a high need for stimulation. But I also have a very finely tuned sense of what works for me – of what feels right – and I’ve worked hard to honour that. Most of the time, I was simply seeking the right fit.

In 2008, I landed in a job that I really wanted and, 6 months later, bought my condo and settled into a wonderful community. For 16 years, I stayed with the same employer and in the same home. What a record! My retirement and move to France disrupted that steady state.

This week I gave a lot of thought to why I wanted to disrupt my life again and here’s what I concluded: I miss feeling settled like I was in Toronto and I think this apartment will bring me back into a place of equillibium. It feels right. After a week of soulsearching and overthinking, I decided to take the leap.

I believe this move is a significant step towards settling in Pézenas for years to come. I feel like I’ve landed, against all odds.

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Photos

Here are a few photos from in and around Pézenas.

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Song of the week

This week at the café, one of my French friends started to sing the song, Ma Cabane Au Canada, under his breath. It was written by French composer, Loulou Gasté, and sung by his wife, Line Renaud. Released in 1949, it became one of the biggest hits of that year in France.

The sound, and some of the lyrics, are old. But it touches my heart.

My cabin in Canada | Is nestled deep in the woods | Squirrels can be seen | On the porch | If the door has no lock | Then there’s nothing to steal | Under the roof of my cabin in Canada | It waits, numb under the snow.

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À bientôt .